So I’m really bored like all the time and I have no school to go to and all my friends got jobs and my mom’s sleeping next to me and the light that’s coming into my window is too clear causing I can’t look out of the window and I’m having tiny conversations about nothing cause I have no life to talk about and all I can do is sit and watch this screen getting more painful for my eyes and while doing that singing along with the radio playing music I’ve heard too many. I’m still waiting for my own choice which education I want to do the coming 4 years and there are 3 of them and I don’t even know if I like them that much and it’s so frustrating and I hate I can’t read something about some education and thinking ‘YES THIS IS IT!’. I just don’t and it won’t ever happen, cause I can’t decide those things myself or something. It’s such a big thing to make choices about. I just need to think, what do I want everyday of my life after these 4 years of studying. MAN, I don’t know? And why should I know? I’m just 20 years old and maybe I like something much more in 4 years and the things I’ve started are out of interest already. This is hard. Too hard. And because politics decided to make everything harder and they stop financing studies and students and they make up a loan system that give us more debts when we won’t start this year.
And then there’s my driving license, got two lessons to go and then there is my final exam. I’m so nervous and I need to get it the first time, cause I’ve never failed myself with these things and I can’t fail others and I can’t fail myself, because some people would make fun of it and I need to prove myself because of that. And I want a girlfriend. I want love. I want support. I want to give. I want to share. I want to touch. I want to feel. I want to live.
My cats have a better life.
So. My life is stupid, haha. BUT, in 2 weeks I’ll go to Greece for 3 weeks and after that I’ll go to London for a week and then the holidays almost start and I hope that’ll be a great time and I hope the weather gets better so we can be like those jummy cookies; brown and delicious. And tasting jummy too. So. Yes. That was that.